The sailor

The sailor – One of the best ways to press woollen trousers is to put them either under a mattress or under a rug overnight. O------- had a habit of putting his trousers under his mattress all night and in the morning his trousers, very slightly dampened the night before, would be neatly pressed. The roll calls in the mornings were at an ungodly, early hour and most of the guys stumbled out of their bunks, weaved to the parade ground, and then opened their eyes. On one roll call parade, the inspecting officer stopped abruptly in front of O------- and was taken by surprise at what he saw. O-------’s trousers looked like those belonging to a sailor as they were pressed with the creases running down the sides instead of down the front like an airman’s. O------- looked down and his eyes were like saucers as the look on his face was one of wonderment. When he went out to have a shower before going to bed the night before, Summers and I changed his trousers around to crease like a sailor’s and then put them back under the mattress. We knew that O------- wouldn’t have his eyes open when he went to the early morning parade.